Strength in Time of Mourning

I asked what it was about yesterday and didn't get an answer, or so I thought. I knew I needed to pay attention to something or someone but, couldn't figure it out. I also remembered for the umpteenth time, the smell of the liquid ointment my uncle sprinkles on a tissue paper or a handkerchief for my sniffles when I was a child. It made me smile because I have the sniffles now and wondered if he still had the ointment after such a long time.

Last night was no different. That feeling weighed heavily on me and made me cry for a few minutes (during Blackhawks intermission. Crazy huh?!) Well, I did what I've always done,  something I learned from my grandma and my mum - I prayed. Speaking of my mum, this post is also a tribute to her because all of this reminds me that it is better to pay tribute to the living than when they're gone.

I was on the train this morning when my aunt called to tell me that my uncle died yesterday at 3pm. Yes, uncle sniffles combatant. I could hear the sadness in my aunt's voice as she tried to tell me what happened and what's going to follow in the coming days. I stayed calm and tried not to let the images in, you know the ones that spring up and in quick succession, when you get the news that a loved one has passed. Then my aunt said that my mum has put her brother in the morgue. Now, that was one image I couldn't fight.

This would be the second time since my grandma's funeral that my mum has done this but, in this image all I saw was her extraordinary strength. My mum is the strongest woman I know. She takes everything in stride and never pauses. Now that I think about it, everyone leans on her when they need to do so. Amidst any stress or turmoil, all she has to do is break out her dimpled smile and you can immediately feel her strength in the light that surrounds her. Maybe it has to do with her involvement in sports or maybe, she's just wired that way.

Yes, there are moments when my mum allows herself to break down at the weight of whatever's going on at the time. When that's over, she forges ahead to tackle whatever it is. Maybe this is one of those few occasions where she's going to have to allow herself to break down because I think it's got to be the hardest thing ever to put your brother in the morgue, let alone doing it for the second time within a short period.

I am already missing my uncle and I am sorry that I didn't realize that the memories of the nasal ointment were your spirit calling out to me. Thank you for all the words of wisdom you gave me and probably didn't realize the impact they'd have in my life. I'll try to be strong for the family so, you don't have to worry about them okay.

Fly into the light dear uncle and let your new wings glide into the throne of God. Fly, my new angel for the time has come. Soar bright, soar fair and until we meet again, soar high!

Rest In Peace!