Fall On Your Back, Vault Again

I can’t remember the exact day I turned on my television to watch the Olympics and saw this girl, Yamilet Pena Abreu, a Dominican Republic gymnast, her eyes brimming with restricted tears and doubt about to set in (too bad I couldn’t find an image that captured the expression on her face at the time). As it turned out, she had landed on her back when she meant to land on her feet on her first try at the Women’s Vault in the London 2012 Olympics qualifications. So, I met her on her second try and boy, did that image draw me in! I was alone in my apartment but, if you’d come close to my door, you’d have heard me talking to her as if she could hear me. I remember saying to her, “it’s okay, you can do this. Don’t cry, take a deep breath and go for it. You’ve got this, run, leap, and vault!” I must have said several other things until she made that vault which had a strange name. She landed on her feet this time and though she took one step backwards to maintain her balance, she did it and I was satisfied as I imagine she must have been. Congratulations to her for making it to the Olympics and vaulting, in spite of her earlier fall.

Today, I find myself reflecting on that day because of several reasons I won’t outline here. Let me just say that I find myself in a similar position where the one thing I planned to be my foothold, and used as an excuse was taken away yesterday. Now it's decision time. I have been telling myself all day that I’ve got this. Coincidentally, I told everyone that I would make a decision today, the first day of August and though we didn’t get that far, I believe my sister’s call yesterday was in anticipation of my decision. I laughed with myself this morning and felt the assurance of God’s love for me and how, He is in charge of everything that I do regardless of my penchant for control. Yes, I have been trying to not do it anymore and I think I’ve been succeeding thus far which explains the sudden burst of laughter this morning.

Should I grieve for what’s lost? No, I shouldn’t and I’m not. Does it make the decision a “slam dunk”? No, it doesn’t. The truth is, I didn’t give it a second thought because of what I was doing and God has said “NO” to that. So I’ve got this in the sense that I can now focus on these two things and finally give my answer. Decisions, phew! Yes, I’ve got this with God on my side. Rainn Wilson put it this way on OWNTv’s Super Soul Sunday – “God is the fashioner.” He was right and if that weren’t real earlier to me, it is now. Ray Bradbury succinctly put it this way, “Go to the edge of the cliff and jump off. Build your wings on the way down.” So, here’s to taking a deep breath and making that vault or taking that leap off the cliff (as many times as it takes), while God fashions my wings on the way down. I think Rainn Wilson will agree with that last part.